Deception
“You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.” – Psalm 51:16-17, The Bible, NIV
“Whatever you do, He will make good of it. But not the good He had prepared for you if you had obeyed Him.” – Perelandra by C.S. Lewis, page 316
One of my favorite miniseries’ of all time is Chernobyl, a live-action retelling of the nuclear disaster that struck Ukraine (then a republic of the USSR) in 1986. While morose and unflinchingly depressing, the story acts as a cautionary tale to those that find themselves tempted to deceive in order to avoid consequences or hardship. The fallout of Chernobyl—which was initially denied by the Soviet government—was felt not just at the initial explosion but across the span of decades. Adults and children were stricken with cancer and thousands of civilians were displaced from their homes. The total contamination was estimated to be around 5 million.
In this massive real-life scenario, deception was sowed and suffering was reaped. But it’s not just governments or large companies that have a knack for trying to avoid consequences. Deception is simply part of the human condition, a temptation that lies within each of us. But when we understand the pain that even small deceptions can cause and are filled with love to care for and protect others, we can avoid our own “nuclear fallout” and instead nurture and cultivate life in our relationships.
A Force That Separates Us
“Every lie we tell incurs a debt to the truth. Sooner or later, that debt is paid.” – Valery Legasov, Soviet inorganic chemist, known for his efforts to expose the Chernobyl disaster
Pornography, affairs, addictions, and the like are often drivers that bring couples into marriage counseling. The narrative is usually that one partner was discovered in their addiction, shattering the other’s reality, causing them great pain, and leaving them wondering where to go and if the marriage can be salvaged. “How could you do this to me?” the other partner says. “Who are you, really? How long has this been going on? When you told me X, were you actually lying to me?” The consequences of months or possibly years of deception and hiding come back tenfold. Often, the one deceiving did not set out to intentionally hurt their partner. Nonetheless, that is where they find themselves, on the receiving end of their beloved’s horror, pain, and anger.
Deceiving Ourselves to Deceive Others
“What is the cost of lies? It’s not that we’ll mistake them for the truth. The real danger is that if we hear enough lies, then we no longer recognize the truth at all.” – Valery Legasov
Deception begins in the soul and functionally makes it so that a person has to live in and maintain two different worlds. When we deceive, we present to others one reality while knowing inside that what we present is actually not true, or at least not fully accurate. Then we find that we must make concessions in our beliefs somewhere in order to justify our choices:
“It doesn’t hurt them if I don’t tell them.”
“I’m not planning on doing this for long, just one more time and that’s it.”
“Well, they have been cold to me lately and I’m feeling lonely.”
As time goes on, we burn more and more energy trying to avoid detection as we maintain the two worlds. Eventually though, the tension of constant maintenance must give way somehow, revealing itself as panic, anxiety, or even depression. The two worlds, like magnets, are on a collision course. If they are not held back, they will collide and the resulting catastrophe will, upon reflection, never have been worth all the energy given toward keeping them apart.
Avoiding Falsehood, Committing To Truth
The hard truth is, even when deception is exposed it does not pay the price immediately. The consequences of it ripple over the course of time, as if one were exploring the very ground of Chernobyl itself today and seeing the destruction, decay, and ruin. To the person who has been deceived, this rippling destruction is the reality that they find themselves in. If the relationship is to recover, the deceiver has to let go of their deception and adopt a spirit and lifestyle of repentance and humility. Humility to admit wrongdoing without blame-shifting or gaslighting. Humility to accept hearing about the other’s pain and anger and apologize for it. Humility to commit from there on out to a life of integrity and love.
Hope When All Seems Lost
Chernobyl, the miniseries, ends on a dim note. It does not offer much hope for restoration beyond the caution to avoid future falsehood. However, recently, scientists have discovered a black fungus called Cladosporium sphaerospermum. It is not only existing on the walls of the nuclear reactor itself but is thriving and “eating” the radiation that still emanates from the reactor’s core (Travers). The fungus is, quite simply, healing the environment by absorbing the radiation. So even in the most desolate of situations where all seems irredeemable, life can grow again. God can bring redemption to the darkest corners of the earth, including those that exist in the human heart.
References:
Lewis, C.S. Perelandra. Scribner. 2003.
The Bible. New International Version, Zondervan, 2019.
Travers, Scott. “This Black Fungus Might Be Healing Chernobyl By Drinking Radiation—A Biologist Explains.” Forbes. November 2, 2024.