To the Church: The Ministry of Division, or Reconciliation?
If you’ve been part of a church community for any length of time, you’ve probably experienced some sort of “church hurt.” “Why doesn’t the church look more like Acts 2:42-47!” some may cry out… or at least I do.
The scriptures show the Christians of that time loving each other, serving each other, sharing resources, and going to great lengths in order for Jesus and his goodness to be proclaimed. We also see issues within the churches in that day and how they handled them as well as Jesus’ direct teachings about how to live both individually and together.
It appears the thing I am seeing the most, especially at the 10,000-foot view of the church in America, is a continued increase in segregation, polarization, and churches stuck in theological echo chambers puffing us up in ways which we all believe we are right. This seems to be influencing local churches’ cultures more than we care to admit.
Stuck as spiritual infants
Today, there is so much public stone-throwing, accusations, blaming and finger-pointing happening from every side of the Christian sphere in a way that seems like 1 Corinthians 3. There, Paul is addressing the church as acting like spiritual infants. Just like this chapter, where Christians were dividing over following Apollos or Paul, we see people dividing over celebrity pastors and Christian figures.
This happens at a local level too. Our sins of control, pride, and fear dominate our desires and decision-making in congregations. There is a culture of “heresy hunters” that assume they are right and are the authority of Christian hermeneutics, giving them a “license to kill,” slandering, mistreating, and taking rigid actions in pride, turning into the very people whom they attempt to call out in error. This is not to say that we are not to protect Christian Doctrine, because we are. However, it seems to go too far both in the larger public arena and in local churches. “After all, who is Apollos? Who is Paul? We are only God’s servants through whom you believe the Good News. Each of us did the work the Lord gave us. I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow” (1 Cor. 3:5-6).
Did God give us the work of division or reconciliation?
Where are the examples of faith and love-filled community and debate? Discourse is being traded for pride, and the majority of Christian community (or lack thereof) is only seen for a couple of hours on Sunday. America’s individualistic and consumeristic society has syncretized with the church in a way that seems to have driven the decisions of ecclesiology and missiology into a selfish pursuit. It’s no wonder we are so disconnected—it’s the reflection of our current worldly culture. Maybe we need to have some of Paul’s tone with the church and see ourselves more like spiritual infants; often, I think we act like that.
A lesson in secondary emotions
Instead of coming to each other in charity, love, patience, understanding, and reconciliation, I see and hear reports of so much stewing in anger.
Here’s a quick lesson. Anger is what we in the counseling field call a secondary emotion. This is because anger is rarely the emotion that is actually happening within the person; we learn to display and sit in anger as the proper way to display emotion in our culture through many different mediums.
However, this is not what scripture instructs, nor is it what counselors would say is a healthy way to approach problems. We need coping strategies to deal with that anger, and the coping strategies that we tend to adopt in America are those of avoidance and simply trying to feel better.
This never results in healthy endings. Think about it. We do it all the time and encourage others to “just do what feels good and right.” That is the worst advice for someone trying to reach maturity but seems to be the prevailing script of today. Scripture, and psychotherapy, would both suggest approaching the issues directly—not running from them.
Jesus’ approach to confrontation
We see a systematic approach to confronting each other in Matthew 18. Jesus gives us step-by-step instruction that tells us how to confront someone when we believe they have sinned. This does not mean we go and judge them, but we want to “win them.” Jesus then follows this instruction with a parable in verses 21-35, saying we must humble ourselves in recognition of how much forgiveness we ourselves have been given. If we do not walk in charity with our Christian brothers and sisters, we will suffocate the love and potential relational growth that is available for us.
Too often I experience, read, watch videos, and hear about how Christians avoid issues, suppress their hurt, and then grow in bitterness toward one another. This only leads us in contempt toward Jesus’s bride—the church. God tells us not to hold onto anger or speak ill of each other or we give evil a foothold in our lives (Eph 4:25-29). Unforgiveness and bitterness are not the fruits of the Spirit nor are they ways we should live as Christians. It only leads to more pain.
Healthy church and vulnerability
Healthy church community looks very messy, with conflict, misunderstanding, and our own bent toward sin. But it is also full of love, forgiveness, and charity while seeking to understand each other. Pride admits its faults, wrongdoing is confessed, and relationships dive into vulnerability.
One of today’s popular authors, Brenee Brown, states in her book Rising Strong that “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it's having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage.” As a Christian, we can have that courage without worrying about the outcomes, because our source of love is found in the value that Christ’s death shows us.
Jesus shows us the Gospel in action by dying to win us! If the creator of the universe loved us so much that He sacrificed everything to reconcile us, we can then approach each other with healthy anticipation of love.
Will we sacrifice our comfort, pride, or fears to do the same for each other?